stradasphere

beautiful disaster

2011-08-29T14:31:00.001-07:00

its too early for her to hit the bottle
but she wonders about the hole in the wall
one minute she is plotting her getaway
the next she waits for the cards to fall

she can't find the handle
the one to turn off her spinning mind
some might think she is nothing but trouble
I think she's absolutely fine

She is such a beautiful disaster
Such a pretty mess
She's so far from all together
But she's mine even in distress

a little trip to see the doctor
got her where she needs to be
it won't last, but now she walks on glass
and swims her stormy sea

she'll tell you she is simple
to get her off your mind
she says she doesn't need much
as she whirlwinds through your life

She is such a beautiful disaster
Such a pretty mess
She's so far from all together
But she's mine even in distress

2011 Stradasphere Music

Domo Arigato

2011-07-20T09:54:00.000-07:00

Today felt like just another day. I walked out the door and it felt so robotic. There was my ride, waiting in the driveway, and there I was with my messenger bag and bag full of Ziploc baggies of snacks and salad, books I don’t read and a incredibly neglected journal. The summer air hit me in the face, reminding me of where I live and it will get hotter. The yard looked the same and I felt the same. The best part was an extra kiss from my little girl and the knowing that I actually made her a lunch consisting of more than a peanut butter sandwich. My tasks today are the same as everyday as far as my job and the conversation in my carpool will be relatively the same consisting of the obligatory chatter about kids, work and the occasional fart joke.

“good morning…good morning…hey, how’s it going?”...another day in paradise. Then the dance around the coffee maker and water/ice machine…the breakfast vendor guy is smiling as he makes a killing on his powdered eggs and wimpy bacon. I am then reminded of the emailed menus sent out from him which infuriate me with their misspellings, improper use of capital letters, and overall bad formatting. Glad I brought my own food today. Breakfast for me is a couple pieces of Swiss cheese and hard salami…a far cry from the low fat/high fiber diet my doctor prescribed for me. But I do have some carrots, grapes and a salad in the overly packed refrigerator.

As I write, I realize my verbiage is as mundane as my morning. I am reminded that I actually live a life most people would wish for. I have many people that love me and I love a great many people. I am also reminded of a girl who would listen to me ramble about mundane things every day and that these ramblings are few and far between. Her absence adds to my monotony. So perhaps today is a day to digress into my clouded mind and find some memories to dance around in. Even if these memories are of me rambling about my mundane day to a certain, special girl.

TEN YEARS OF GRACE!

2011-02-23T11:38:00.002-07:00

Ten years ago today, actually tonight, a bright beam of pink sunshine shined into my heart and into my life. Grace Anne Estrada came into the world in the hands of her proud daddy (who now resides around her tiny little finger.) I will never forget the doctor saying, "Come here and get your daughter." HOWEVER, I had no clue she was still inside mommy! I just saw a little part of a tiny little head peaking out, if you know what I mean. The doc says, "Reach in and get her!" Um, yeah, ok, cuz I have done this SO MANY TIMES! But with probably the goofiest smile full of joy, wonder, and mostly fear, I reached in and pulled my baby out.
She was (IS) the most beautiful thing I had ever seen! My shaky but firm hands held her in awe as I handed her to the wildly waving hands of her mom...who didn't get an epidural so she was the boss. After that I got to cut the cord. I had wanted to do it old school, with my teeth, but somehow I changed my mind. The nurses eventually took her and put her on a little table to poke and wipe and well, they were pretty rough! But I stood there with the idiot smile that only dads have and I sang her Amazing Grace. Because she was, and she still is!
She is my princess, a tornado, a little rock star, and did I say she was a princess??? She’s the “Boo” to my “Kitty”…She’s Mylie, I’m Billy Ray…She’s my world and I am toast. She calls me about 5 times a day now...she knows my cell number! She is always ready to dance with daddy, sing with daddy, wrestle with daddy and most of all, snuggle with daddy. Put a fork in me. As I write this, I wish I could take back some of the times I said GRACIE! with a little too much on the end. I wish I could take back a ton of, "I'm too tired right now to dance with you's", and about a thousand "No's". But the good news is she is only 10 and we have a long life together!
In the past year she has become obsessed with cupcakes, skinny jeans, and black nail polish. Not so much the “princess” but all the more my little rock star! As her voice gets more powerful, so does her will! I am already in deep trouble but am so proud!
There is so much more. A universe of smiles, kisses, hugs, talks, hugs, prayers, tears, on and on and on! I realize life goes by so fast, she has her own phone and email and I KNOW she doesn’t just email girls. SO, I am making a quick stop at the gun store just to prepare!
Happy Birthday Princess Grace!

How to rock out your cube!!!

2011-01-12T10:21:00.002-07:00

These are called Fan Posts...very cool for the sports enthusiast!!!

Obligatory New Post

2011-01-12T08:47:00.002-07:00

I haven't posted in so long...oh my wonderful blog, how I miss you so...so much to say...just not now...

Arizona Immigration Law Conjures Ghosts of Southern Neo-Slavery (From The Huffington Post)

2010-04-29T12:59:00.001-07:00

Bob Cesca

Arizona Immigration Law Conjures Ghosts of Southern Neo-Slavery

The violation was known as "vagrancy." If you were a black man in the South following Reconstruction, and you were unable to show proof of employment on-demand to the police, you could be arrested and delivered into what Douglas Blackmon, author of Slavery by Another Name, calls "Neo-Slavery."

"Show me your papers" in the vernacular of the late 19th Century through World War II involved furnishing pay stubs or, if you were lucky, the word of your employer -- some kind of evidence proving to a police officer that you were employed.

But what if you forgot to carry your employment records with you when you left the house that morning? What if you were -- like so many regular citizens -- unaware of the anti-vagrancy law? Hell, what if you were simply unemployed? It might be your last mistake as a free citizen of the United States.

Like so many other African American males of that era, you might be incarcerated, convicted and perhaps sold to a farming, mining or lumber operation. Yes, sold. After the Civil War. After the abolition of slavery and the ratification of the Thirteenth Amendment. Slavery, it turns out, survived.

In the Spring of 1908, a young African American son of slaves living in Alabama named Green Cottonham was arrested at a train station. We don't know for sure what law Cottonham had violated to warrant his arrest because, at his trial, the arresting officer literally forgot the reason why Cottonham was picked up in the first place. So the charge of vagrancy was substituted. Cottonham convicted and sentenced to 30 days of hard labor, but since he was poor and couldn't pay several intentionally impossible-to-pay fines, the 30 day sentence grew to a year. He was carted off and "legally" sold for $12-a-month to U.S. Steel. At age 22, Green Cottonham was shoved into a coal mine as a manual laborer -- occasionally whipped and tortured, eventually dying before the end of his sentence.

Vagrancy and a wide variety of other similar violations were intentionally broad and trivial -- not intended to clean up the streets, but, instead, to suppress the advancement of blacks, as well as to feed the engines of agriculture and industry in the South with cheap forced labor.

This was a back-door slave trade, ensnaring hundreds of thousands of African American men. The Southern judicial system, fueled by ridiculous laws and ridiculous trials, became an above-boards means of rebuilding the South on the backs of slave labor. And it flourished until just after Pearl Harbor when President Roosevelt asked the Justice Department to shut it all down for fear the Germans and Japanese would use it against us in their propaganda.

Fast forward to 2010.

Last week, shortly before the Republican governor of Arizona, Jan Brewer, signed the state's new anti-immigration law, an Hispanic truck driver was stopped at a weigh station along Rt. 202 by a patrol officer.

The commercial truck driver, "Abdon," is a natural born citizen of the United States. He's obviously employed. He speaks English. He pays taxes. His wife, Jackie, is a natural born citizen of the United States. She, too, is employed. She speaks English. She pays taxes.

And yet "Adbon" was shackled by the police and detained by the Phoenix Immigration and Customs Enforcement office.

Why?

Because when the officer demanded his papers, Abdon could only produce a driver's license and his Social Security number. Not good enough. At that roadside weigh station in the middle of an otherwise ordinary weekday, Abdon made the mistake of not carrying his birth certificate with him. His birth certificate!

Put another way, Abdon was handcuffed and detained because he's Hispanic.

And now this is the law of the state of Arizona -- arresting people, citizen or not, simply for appearing Hispanic. The ghosts of Green Cottonham, "anti-vagrancy" laws and Black Codes. America has resurrected its predilection for rounding up brown people based on flimsy excuses and good ol' boy lawmaking.

While there's no evidence that the Arizona law will feed the rise of a new underground forced labor market in the United States, it's clear that the various components of neo-slavery are here now. And the optics and civil liberties violations, say nothing of the long-term consequences, are horrible. We're on the brink of rounding up Hispanic people on ridiculous charges while American corporations are actively engaged in the trafficking of illegal immigrant labor.

How soon, I wonder, until we read about Hispanic people -- citizens or otherwise -- being picked up for not having their birth certificates and other "papers" in their back pockets and consequently shipped off on some sort of prison "work release" program to a cabbage farm or meat packing plant? Free labor is slave labor.

This week, Eugene Robinson asked a salient question about the Arizona law: where are the tea party people who claim to be against government overreach? Where are the tea party people who claim to support the Constitution above all else?

The Arizona law specifically violates the Fourth Amendment: "The right of the people to be secure in their... papers and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause..." It's unconstitutional to arrest people because they merely look suspicious and then fail to produce a birth certificate as proof of citizenship. Period. But Glenn Beck, for example, said the Arizona law is okay because "the Constitution is not a suicide pact." He's suggesting here that the Constitution is important until it contradicts his crusade.

The answers to Eugene Robinson's questions are also revealed in the tea party movement's contradictory anger over certain Americans receiving ample tax cuts that reduced their 2009 federal income tax to zero. As it turns out, the tea party doesn't, in fact, support tax cuts. The tea party only supports tax cuts for tea party people. Likewise, they only support constitutional rights and liberties for tea party people. If the tea party was really about freedom, they'd be standing side-by-side with anti-Arizona protesters. But they won't. Actually, I wonder what the tea party would say about a law that allowed authorities to demand papers from people who look like Glenn Beck or Sarah Palin?

It's obvious that Republicans and tea party people fear the browning of America, with whites shrinking to a 47 percent minority by 2050, and so these groups are engaged in an effort to make it dangerous to be brown. 40 years and counting -- get them out before it's too late. The obvious reason for targeting the people is to sandbag the rising tide.

If the Republicans are really interested in preventing illegal immigration, they would pass laws that crack down on the trafficking of cheap immigrant labor to corporate farms and factories, but the fines for such violations remain laughably small (around $3,200 per undocumented worker). Writing and reforming the law on the corporate side to disincentivize the exploitation of illegal immigrant labor makes the most sense, while leaving civil rights intact. Instead, the Arizona law transparently targets and punishes all Hispanics regardless of their citizenship status (not to mention people like me who appear somewhat Hispanic). It makes the race component of both the Republican Party and the tea party movement that much more evident.

Like the neo-slavery laws of the old South, the Arizona immigration law is another way for the white, Republican establishment to retain some semblance of control in the face of a growing minority population. If history is any indication, it could also end up becoming another conduit for trafficking immigrant labor. Meanwhile, it will further institutionalize a distrust of authority while augmenting racial resentments in an increasingly incendiary environment. As of right now, however, we have an opportunity to stop all of this before history repeats itself. Fortunately, we just happen to have a president with a unique insight into racial tensions -- a president who can turn the tide.

Bob Cesca on Twitter
Bob Cesca's Awesome Blog
Listen to the Bob & Elvis Show every Thursday morning at 10 a.m EDT

Meanwhile, back at the blog

2010-04-08T12:07:00.001-07:00

You never know how good you got it until someone takes it from you, you screw it up, or it evaporates. I just realized how good I had it at my last job. I had an office with a door and basically no supervision. I ran a team of designers that basically ran themselves. The part I am really missing right now is blogging on a regular basis. I had the time to read other blogs, connect with other bloggers, get inspired and write on a consistent basis. After a brutal layoff, yours truly is now in a call center environment, micromanaged, and chained by the head to a phone.

Talk about tinnitus! Well thanks to a blog application in Word I can send this to my blog without being online but it isn't the same. This all hit me this morning when I finally snuck a little internet time when the warden was away…popped on to my old iheartsingleparents page and stumbled on to a very cool blog by one QT Mama. This sneaky little adventure had me longing for wasting my company's time by expressing and or exposing myself (no! you pervert!) to the blogosphere on a regular basis. I felt like "someone".

I felt like me. I felt a part of something. I express myself differently here, much different than hanging with my brother, co-workers etc. I seem to turn off the creative side of me around most people in my current circle. There is no discussing authors, writing, artistic endeavors, on and on. Most people don't understand the appeal of documenting what most would seem mundane topics and call that creative. I get it though. Bloggers get it. A bunch of damn weirdos if you ask me but it's where a part of me fits.

I want to thank QT Mama for reminding me that toothbrushes can be interesting. And thanks to Microsoft for the blog app in Word!

The Light of Truth

2010-03-25T15:16:00.001-07:00

If you would see everything filtered through the light of truth, you'd never, ever again know sadness, lack, or limits. You'd see that you are safe. Bathed in love. Surrounded by admirers in both the physical and spiritual realms you grace. You'd see only beauty, perfection, and meaning. And you'd realize that just as the stark contrasts of time and space and the illusions of have and have not imprison you, so too can they make possible wings that will lift you higher.

Seek understanding, or as it was once put, seek first the Kingdom of Heaven, and everything else will be added unto you. (Same thing, different audience, grossly misunderstood to this very day.)

Cawwww, cawwwwwww, cawwwwwwwww.... (Soaring bird sounds.)

Tallyho,
The Universe

Mi Vida Nuevo

2010-03-24T14:40:00.001-07:00

You have heard it before, "what seems to be a nightmare could be a dream come true"…blah, blah, blah, HOWEVER I can attest to some truth in this. A month or so ago the IRS and I had a little run in which, in turn, caused me to get evicted in a moment's notice. This landed my son and I living with my brother and my soon-to-be-ex and my daughter at my sister-in-laws. This kick in the teeth was actually a good kick in the butt to move forward with my life. The inevitable, yet amiable, split from married life has now become a reality.

So as of today, I have secured a house for my kids! I also found out there are good people out there—the landlady is working with me on the rent, deposits and all that in a way that won't break my bank! I love the house and there is even a music room. Rock on! It is close to the kids' schools, friends, family, and just a couple blocks away from the lounge I play at every other week!

Oh and why am I rambling on about this in cyberspace? It didn't seem real this morning, now it does. Writing it out makes it more real…there is more to do though…FIND SOME WHEELS, take care of some legal obligations, and start being a single dad! Whew.

Inspire the Universe

2010-03-17T14:16:00.001-07:00

The slate's been wiped clean, the past has released its grip, and before you sparkles eternity, yearning for direction. All that lies between you and the life of your dreams is just one teeny, tiny, gentle, little rule. Only one condition, prerequisite, principle that matters.

It's not love. It's not God. It's not fate, or luck, or karma. It's not complicated or esoteric, and you needn't sacrifice, plead, or pray to invoke it. It's the only rule that's ever existed, and it's the only one that will ever exist. No reality can exist in its absence. For its mere existence, you are. With its existence, the power, the light, and the way are revealed. It's your purpose to discover it, and it's your destiny to master it. It's the beginning, the middle, and the end. The Alpha and the Omega. The be-all and end-all of every wish, desire, and dream, and you are its keeper.

This caveat of all caveats is that absolutely nothing can be anything until it is first imagined. Thoughts become things, nothing else does. And so, it's the thoughts you choose from here on out that will become the things and events of your life, forevermore. It is written in stone. There's no other way. It's your ticket to anywhere you can dream of. Your passport to abundance, health, and friendships. The key to the palace of your wildest dreams.

Your thoughts, and your thoughts alone, will set you in motion. Your thoughts will yield the inspiration, creativity, and determination you need. Your thoughts will orchestrate the magic and inspire the Universe. Your thoughts will carry you to the finish line if you just keep thinking them. Never give up. Never waiver, doubt, or ask.

Aim high.

That you've even received this Note, that you're able to read it through, means you are so close. So extraordinarily close. The hardest work has been done. The wars have already been waged. The lessons have already been learned. The journey, now, is for home.

Ain't no Blarney,
The Universe

Look!

2010-03-16T16:36:00.001-07:00

Those who achieve great things, defeat long odds, and become legends didn't have anything you don't have.

They just kept showing up, expecting a miracle, long after everyone else got practical.

Here comes one now...!
The Universe

A Hot Parade

2010-03-11T10:17:00.001-07:00

It's working! Every day you're getting closer! Everything you've ever wanted is being pressed toward you. Everything is clicking. Don't let the illusions trick you. Don't let the events of today dampen your spirits. Things couldn't be any better than they now are. You couldn't have more reasons to celebrate. Now! Do it! The hardest work is done! Just show up, be present, open every door and let events unfold. Life is your stage. This is your parade. Together we can do anything.

I love it when you're hot,
The Universe

Just Do It!

2010-03-10T16:33:00.001-07:00

I bet you could do something for someone today who'd remember it for the rest of their life.
In a good way.

On your mark, get set...
The Universe

--I recommend you giving out an unexpected Free Hug to someone!

Lionel

Happy Birthday To My Sis Stacey!!

2010-03-08T11:48:00.001-07:00

Never underestimate the immense importance of someone's birthday to that same someone, on that very day.
It's like, really, really HUGE.
Especially when you appreciate that they chose it, probably one million years ago, surrounded by the wisest of the wise, scared to pieces by rumors of tigers, volcanoes, and cough medicine. Yet encouraged, nevertheless, by tales of romance, adventure, and... you.

Really.
No, really!

Thanks,
The Universe

The Day My Old Mp3 Player Kicked My iPod’s Ass!

2010-03-05T16:56:00.001-07:00

It didn't start out like any other day. I woke up in a new environment, got to work a different way, and sat in a different desk..ahem, cube. Actually most everything about today and my life is quite different…technically single after 10 years, going to be living with JUST my kids soon, renting a cool little house soon with room enough to make music (thanks to Little Miss Voodoo Eyes)…the whole fresh start thing, just without the new car smell.

So I popped in my iPod into this radio/alarm clock/iPod player thing at work for some tunage. Now THIS was like every other day. Not that I had bad tunes on it, but just the SAME tunes…some Beatles, some WHO (of course), BoDeans, random John Hiatt, but a lot of the same since I haven't updated it in a while…(well except for some songs by the Do Dos I was turned on to by Little Miss Voodoo Eyes)

THEN I realized I had my old trusty Rio Mp3 player in my messenger bag or "murse" as my son would say! But it wouldn't plug into the aforementioned radio thingy. I even thought of trying to splice wires together to rig some sort of link…THEN the simplest answer was staring me in the face! Some cheesy cheap-ass headphones that my employer gave us to listen to some training thing. So I just slapped them on my head and moved my headset aside (yeah I am a phone slave) and then bliss!

A whole new collection of songs I haven't heard in a while. A specially selected mix I created for bike rides and my occasional workouts. Blocking out the din of hundreds of other dumbass phone calls came The Black Crowes, yes some different WHO, Foos, Dixie Dregs, OLD Aerosmith, some ZZ…just flat out rock!

My not so different day went a step further thanks to an old Mp3 player! In the words of Chris Robinson, "I got my soul singing" on The Day My Old Mp3 Player Kicked My iPod's Ass!

LIONEL AT THE LOUNGE TONITE!!!

2010-03-05T13:42:00.001-07:00

7-9!!! Cactus and Tatum!! BE THERE!!!!!!!!!!!

You can email me for directions! Lionel.estrada@gmail.com!!!

Is It You?

2010-03-04T12:17:00.001-07:00

What if the coolest person on the planet didn't know they were the coolest person on the planet? Just because of a few self doubts, a few trace fears, or the occasional twang of inadequacy. Or because they somehow thought fame, or wealth, or popularity mattered. Or because they just didn't know the effect they had on others.

It would be a pity, huh? An absolute travesty. And of course, telling them wouldn't achieve much because they'd never believe you. Never. They'd be too modest to accept it. Too naïve to believe it. And too cool to think it mattered.

So... well... ah... let's just leave it at that -
The Universe

Red hot smokin' love

2010-02-24T11:02:00.001-07:00

Sometimes having more fun and being happier comes from looking for each in crazy, new places; instead of waiting for them to come from where you've found them before or where others are now finding them.

And I do mean crazy. Not just from the old standbys of travel, adventure, and romance, but from stretching, reaching, and growing. Accepting new responsibilities for your happiness, totally accepting others, and grasping even higher ideals. Philosophically taking yourself to places few have ever dared before.

Red hot smokin' love,
The Universe

Happy #9 Princess Gracie!

2010-02-23T14:36:00.002-07:00

Nine years ago today, actually tonight, a bright beam of pink sunshine shined into my heart and into my life. Grace Anne Estrada came into the world in the hands of her proud daddy (who now resides around her tiny little finger.) I will never forget the doctor saying, "Come here and get your daughter." HOWEVER, I had no clue she was still inside mommy! I just saw a little little part of a tiny little head peaking out, if you know what I mean. The doc says, "Reach in and get her!" Um, yeah, ok, cuz I have done this SO MANY TIMES! But with probably the goofiest smile full of joy, wonder, and mostly fear, I reached in and pulled my baby out.

She was (IS) the most beautiful thing I had ever seen! My shaky but firm hands held her in awe as I handed her to the wildly waving hands of her mom...who didn't get an epidural so she was the boss. After that I got to cut the cord. I had wanted to do it old school, with my teeth, but somehow I changed my mind. The nurses eventually took her and put her on a little table to poke and wipe and well, they were pretty rough! But I stood there with the idiot smile that only dads have and I sang her Amazing Grace. Because she was, and she still is!

She is my princess, a tornado, a little rock star, and did I say she was a princess??? She's the "Boo" to my "Kitty"…She's Mylie, I'm Billy Ray…She's my workd and I am toast. She calls me about 5 times a day now...she knows my cell number! She runs to the door when I get home! She prays for me every night. She is always ready to dance with daddy, sing with daddy, wrestle with daddy and most of all, snuggle with daddy. Put a fork in me. As I write this, I wish I could take back some of the times I said GRACIE! with a little too much on the end. I wish I could take back a ton of, "I'm too tired right now to dance with you's", and about a thousand "No's". But the good news is she is only 9 and we have a long life together!

So, as you can see, my little rock start got her very own Fender Strat and Marshall amp (thanks to an anonymous wonderful donor and friend of the Guitar Center!). She can already play a few chords, she writes her own lyrics, and has an amazing voice. And I am NOT just saying that! She won a $500 scholarship for singing classes!! I am biased, yes, but also right! We are already arguing about who will produce her albums!

There is so much more. A universe of smiles, kisses, hugs, talks, hugs, prayers, tears, on and on and on! I realize life goes by so fast, she has her own phone and email and I KNOW she doesn't just email girls. SO, I am making a quick stop at the gun store just to prepare!

Happy Birthday Princess Grace!

True Work

2010-02-08T09:57:00.001-07:00

Ever have that feeling,that your life, your true work, has not yet begun?

Ever feel like you're here for something more than you've yet identified? And that a billion eyes are upon you, just waiting for the prophecy to unfold?

Hmmmmmm.......

And, have you also ever wanted something so badly that all your wishing, hoping, and praying kept you from seeing that you had it all along?

Precisely,
The Universe

Look Ma, No Brakes!

2010-01-25T17:21:00.001-07:00

"Even though you may want to move forward in your life, you may have one foot on the brakes. In order to be free, we must learn how to let go. Release the hurt. Release the fear. Refuse to entertain your old pain. The energy it takes to hang onto the past is holding you back from a new life. What is it you would let go of today?"

Mary Manin Morrissey

The Finish Line

2010-01-25T16:38:00.001-07:00

The trick is learning to maintain an unwavering focus upon your desired end result, your completed dream, the "finish line," without insisting upon, or even contemplating, its means of attainment, no matter how logical, obvious, or tempting it may seem.

Tallyho,
The Universe

Gray days

2010-01-21T16:18:00.001-07:00

What if funky, confusing, gray, lonely days were just part of a "system" that, in turn, created bright, rich, happy, friendly days?

What if they were just meant to give deeper elements of your creativity a rest?

What if they were deliberately crafted holidays, of a sort, devised by your inner psyche to relieve you from the pressure of artificial expectations?

Would you still bemoan them, wonder what's wrong with you, or fear that they'll never end? Or, Lionel, would they kind of tickle you pink?

You party animal, you -
The Universe

Big Hearts

2010-01-15T12:03:00.001-07:00

Some people just have big hearts. And with this gift they're very often able to feel, offer, and show far more love than they receive from those around them. Which, at times, is a heavy load to bear. So today I'd like to remind them, and especially you, that the sun asks not that the moon and planets help brighten each day, but relishes her role as a keeper of the light and a bringer of the dawn. A role much like your own.

Happy weekend, from the Sun and I -
The Universe

BIG THING

2010-01-12T15:34:00.001-07:00

The BIG THING rarely happens when you ask for it, nor does it typically come from who or where you expect. It usually comes a bit later, from someone you didn't even know when you first asked, as a result of some weird turn of events that were impossible to foresee.

So, chill. Be patient. Enjoy the moment. And let your friends, employers, and partners off the hook. Besides, they're going to have enough to deal with when the BIG THING does arrive, if you know what I mean.

Won't be long,
The Universe

Massive Action!

2010-01-11T13:56:00.001-07:00

"The big secret in life is that there is no secret. Whatever your goal, you can get there if you are willing to work. It is called massive action. Action is the gas in the tank. Without it, the car will not run."

Marcy Blochowiak

2010, Baby!

2010-01-08T10:28:00.001-07:00

Now, I have to admit that among inventions, the "Undo" button is right up there with the very greatest of all time, but it'll never compare to the "Do" button, from which worlds are born.

This is your chance!

2010, Baby -
The Universe

Surrender!

2010-01-07T12:04:00.001-07:00

I understand that you must wonder, sometimes to the point of bewilderment, at what you're truly capable of doing. Yet, therein lies the "problem," because living the life of your dreams is far more about what I'm capable of doing.

Surrender -
The Universe

Celebrate You

2009-12-29T08:57:00.001-07:00

If it's not yet obvious to you, the real reason for this, and all seasons, is you. A more perfect child of the Universe has never lived. Until now, only celebrations cloaked in myth and mystery could hint at your divine heritage and sacred destiny. You are life's prayer of becoming and its answer. The first light at the dawn of eternity, drawn from the ether, so that I might know my own depth, discover new heights, and revel in seas of blessed emotion.

A pioneer into illusion, an adventurer into the unknown, and a lifter of veils. Courageous, heroic, and exalted by legions in the unseen.

To give beyond reason, to care beyond hope, to love without limit; to reach, stretch, and dream, in spite of your fears. These are the hallmarks of divinity - traits of the immortal - your badges of honor. May you wear them with a pride as great as the immeasurable pride we feel for you.

Your light has illuminated darkened paths, your gaze has lifted broken spirits, and already your life has changed the course of history.

This is the time of year we celebrate YOU!

Bowing before Greatness,
The Universe

CORRECTION!! 9-11 AT THE LOUNGE!!!!

2009-12-22T15:57:00.001-07:00

BE THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HEY ALL!! LAST MINUTE SHOW TONITE AT THE LOUNGE!

2009-12-22T15:11:00.001-07:00

Just found out I will be at Paradise Lounge tonite from 9-11! Unplug from holiday shopping and pop in for a drink and some music!!

Paradise
Lounge

4541 E Cactus Rd ·

Phoenix

(602) 953-2993

Giving and Giving

2009-12-22T09:29:00.001-07:00

What people rarely give themselves credit for is that their giving continues giving, even after they've forgotten giving, and even when they didn't know they were giving, forever and ever and ever.

At least I'm keeping score,
The Universe

Lionel At Paradise Lounge Tonight! 7-9!

2009-12-18T15:39:00.001-07:00

An eclectic set of your favorite songs (or not!) played by yours truly!

Beatles, Who, Crowes, Pearl Jam, Smithereens, Stones, Cash, Audioslave….i could go on and on!

No Cover-cheap drinks…cheaper jokes…good tunage!

Listings for paradise lounge near Phoenix, AZ

Paradise
Lounge

4541 E Cactus Rd Phoenix

(602) 953-2993

Paradise
Lounge - Phoenix, AZ

Located across from Paradise Valley Mall, South Side of Cactus, behind the Baskin-Robbins.
www.paradiselounge.biz

Earth Rocks

2009-12-17T15:05:00.001-07:00

Most people will find the following very hard to believe but there is nothing, ever, worth being unhappy about.

Because no matter what happens, it will add to you, you'll still live forever, and our love affair will remain tabloid fodder in realms far, far away.

Thank you.

Earth rocks,
The Universe

Success From Eyes of The Universe

2009-12-16T09:52:00.001-07:00

Just wanted to remind you that sometimes success is better measured in smiles received, giggles heard, and hands held, than in dollars earned, deadlines met, and kilos shed.

And I must say, you've done well for yourself.

Yeah us!
The Universe

Surrender, yet prepare

2009-12-14T13:49:00.001-07:00

Surrender to the magic. That's why it's there. That's why you're there -- to learn that there really are miracles and that they abound, as if on command, once you understand the truth about your reality and heritage.

Surrender, yet prepare.

Ask, yet expect.

You can do this. You've been doing it your entire life. Be swift and awaken to the truth, because for the new souls now watching, your successes will also be theirs.

It's good to be you,

Get Down On It!

2009-12-09T10:15:00.001-07:00

What one little thing could you do today within your means and your comfort zone, that would make you feel like a supercoolhappylovething?

Get down on it,
The Universe

Just Remembered to Remember John

2009-12-08T18:01:00.001-07:00

On this day 29 years ago some dumbass blew away Lennon. NO, I have no flowery intro or poetic prelude to the story because there is no way to flower power this one up. I have been sad, confused, mortified, but today I am just plain mad. I missed out…we all missed out. Not just the holy grail of a Beatles reunion but the comeback of one of the greatest musical minds of all time. And how it happened makes no sense! Minutes after a photo shoot for his new album in years, he gets killed…NO MURDERED.

I know this is not much of a loving tribute, and I am sorry. But Lennon spoke his mind, so WWJD?

I did!

Peace John!

HELP!! ANYONE GOING TO KISS TONIGHT?????

2009-12-01T16:02:00.001-07:00

I need to find a ride home (N. Scottsdale) for my son and I from the concert!! If you can hook us up PLEASE send me a Facebook message with your number and I'll give you a call…or email me at lionel.estrada@gmail.com!! In the words of Joe Walsh…"I lost my license, now I don't drive"

THANKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Shoot me an email and a got a beer for you!!!!

From JFK

2009-11-24T15:54:00.001-07:00

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them."

John F. Kennedy
1917-1963, 35th President of the United States

M&M's

2009-11-23T10:33:00.001-07:00

You see, the thing about Miracles-in-the-Making, or M&M's as they're affectionately called here, is that they must be disguised amongst the plain and ordinary events of each day. Until, of course, they come to pass, at which point the dreamer they had swirled around can comfortably be labeled lucky or blessed. Otherwise you'd be slammed with worshippers and devotees. Believe me, not pretty.

This isn't by divine law; it's just in keeping with the times you're in. Most folks aren't quite ready to have their belief systems blown to pieces with overtly obvious miracles, but this is changing.

Glad you're different,
The Universe

Perfect Note For Friday!

2009-11-20T09:50:00.001-07:00

Think back to a happy time. A really, really happy time in your life. Go back as far as it takes, to a time when you felt so light you thought you might float.

Do you remember it? The carefree feeling? The acceptance of the moment, of yourself, of life? Feeling unfettered by thoughts of the future and oblivious to the past?

Feel it a little longer...

There. Very nice.

Yours,
The Universe

Start where you stand

2009-11-17T17:35:00.001-07:00

"Do not wait; the time will never be 'just right.' Start where you stand, and work with whatever tools you may have at your command, and better tools will be found as you go along."

Napoleon Hill

A Note from the Universe

2009-11-06T11:36:00.001-07:00

Did you know
there have been a lot of decisions you've made and followed through on, under the most trying and difficult of circumstances, that have actually become textbook examples of taking the "high road" for wannabe rock stars here in the unseen?

And we've sold tons of "your book,"
The Universe

A Great Note From The Universe

2009-11-05T10:33:00.001-07:00

The thing that's totally different between children and adults is that children have the ability to spontaneously use their imagination to forget what's bothering them and be inspired by every pony, feather, or bug that crosses their path.

Oh, yeah... you're like that.

It's easy,
The Universe

Short And Sweet

2009-11-03T15:22:00.001-07:00

If you think on it long enough, you'll know.

You just will.

Works for me,
The Universe

Today’s Note From The Universe

2009-10-27T15:28:00.001-07:00

People who live only for dessert very rarely enjoy the main course.

And sometimes a meal is like life.

Bon appétit,
The Universe

(And no, I don't write these!)

Very Cool Note From The Universe!

2009-10-23T10:18:00.001-07:00

It's got nothing to do with being a perfect, goody-goody, selfless, sacrificing, spiritual saint. Blah! That whole characterization was meant for a different audience at a different time, and they really had issues.

It's got everything to do with being yourself, trusting the magic, following your heart, dreaming big, and having fun.

Hosanna in the highest,
The Universe

Another Note From The Universe (or Mike Dooley!)

2009-10-21T16:31:00.001-07:00

When it comes to setting aside a little time each day to visualize look at it like this:

No matter how distracted you become or how confused you are about the process, the simple fact that you gave your dream this time and attention means you did it correctly, you did it long enough, and that by the time you open your eyes, already in the unseen, huge wheels have begun turning.

HUGE.

You think I'd make it hard?

Your humble servant,
The Universe

Notes From The Universe

2009-10-19T14:28:00.001-07:00

The agent, the producer, the investors; consultants, lenders, stockholders; customers, clients, fans; friends, lovers, support systems... they have nothing to do with dreams coming true.

They're simply summoned after someone's "made up their mind" to the degree that it's followed by unending action.

Same with accidents and coincidences.

You see dreams actually come true (or not), long before they can be seen in time and space.

Yeah, 'mon,
The Universe

The Need For Simplification

2009-10-15T11:36:00.001-07:00

It has become very apparent than I need to do the following things immediately.

Get a vehicle
Move back to Paradise Valley ASAP so my daughter can take the bus to school. Even if it means breaking my lease at current apartments.

SOOO if you have an inexpensive vehicle for sale or house to rent hit me up!

Notes From The Universe

2009-10-15T09:38:00.001-07:00

What if today was your "last" day or this week was your "last" week, and heaven had 10,000 angels waiting to serenade you, dancers waiting to dance with you, and reporters waiting to interview you?

Is there a grudge you'd still hold? Something you'd still regret? An unhappy memory that would matter more than forever and ever?

Nada, baby -
The Universe

Thoughts From Og

2009-10-14T16:09:00.001-07:00

"Count your blessings. Once you realize how valuable you are and how much you have going for you, the smiles will return, the sun will break out, the music will play, and you will finally be able to move forward with the life that God intended for you."

Og Mandino

Insight of the Day

2009-10-13T08:50:00.001-07:00

"Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation."

Brian Tracy

Testing again

2009-10-09T17:08:00.001-07:00

Happy Birthday Betty Mae

2009-10-09T11:40:00.000-07:00

69 years ago something magical happened. A baby girl was born. Oh there were many baby girls born on this particular day but one in particular shined brighter. Yes, I can say that. Yes, I am biased. I was told this happened in El Paso, Texas and I believe them. So many stories about her have surfaced over the years. Some say she had a tough time of it, that she was unloved or at the very least, misunderstood. One story tells the tale of the only little Irish girl amidst a lot of other little Mexican girls in a school in a convent. Fitting for her; since she married into a Mexican family and loved them all. She could not, however, master the art of making tortillas. But oh how she tried! As a teenager, she dreamed of being a model. She had a flashing smile and the right dresses. She loved the camera and the camera loved her. She just wasn’t “too skinny” enough. All who knew her say she was, always was, very bright. Not just smart, but bright…as in brilliance. I can personally attest to that.

Then she met a guy. A charming, handsome man with a big family. She loved that. They hugged each other a lot and cooked REALLY good food. This part of the story is very clouded (not shrouded) in mystery…or lack of information. But this much I know; she got pregnant! I still don’t know if they got married before or after their boy was conceived, but it matters not to this particular story. This much I know; she adored that little boy. I should know. There are pictures of her and her baby. She seems mesmerized. Oh you can say that every mother stares at her baby that way but again, I am biased. She loved being married. She loved being a mom. Being a model paled to her Donna Reed dream come true. Her man was everything to her. She had two more children. A daughter and another son. She loved them all in different ways but with the same intensity. Some say she was partial to the first and I would like to think that, but I am biased.

There are more stories with some unbelievable pain. As in “there is no freakin way that could happen to her” but I am leaving them out. Today’s story is not a tragedy per se. It is one of celebration and joy. All the pain she endured is outshined by what she brought to the dinner table. Joy. A big, bright smile. Music, lots of music. She was “that woman” who sang in the aisle of the grocery store. She sang in the car. She sang all the time. She listened to music constantly, maybe a little too much in another story but not this particular one. Maybe it is because she shares a birthday with John Lennon and John Entwhistle. Maybe she just had music in her heart. Her big, booming, blossoming heart that she shared with everyone. More than anyone was capable of reciprocating. Which is the note this story will end on. A sweet note of love. Everyone who knew her says they loved her. But no one loved her as much as she loved them. I am not sure she was even capable of hatred. She loved. I should know, she loved me more than anyone has ever loved me. She showered me with her love. At times I could not handle it and I still have never been able to understand it.

Yes, I am biased. I was lucky enough to be her son. To be loved so fiercely by her. To be inspired by her. And she bought me my first guitar. In 1980, she had to go. I think the world was too cold for her. Heaven suited her much better because she was an angel. I know no one who would deny that. Yet, she lives on in all the hearts that were touched by hers. Today is her birthday and I miss her. And with a loss for the right words at this particular part of this particular story I just want to say I love you mom. Happy Birthday.
Honeybee

My Monday Morning Mourning

2009-10-05T11:57:00.001-07:00

As I dragged myself into another Monday of phone calls, emails, and rah-rah meetings, I realized there is something missing. Oh sure there can be MORE money, an environment better suited to my personality, and guitars everywhere, but there seems to be an absence of something even more vital. Anyone who knows me can see that I am not a corporate America sort of cat. Cubes are cages to me and offices are merely cages with windows. But as they say (whoever the F "they" are), "a boy's gotta eat. And that would go for his family too. So it's both the starving artist, and starving family, life or I do the J.O.B. thing…at least for now. The commute. The dress slacks. The "good mornings". The wait for a fricken cup of coffee. Then there is that damn computer. Not one with a microphone and guitar connected to it. Nor is it one with a page of writings, stories, blogs, and lyrics. No, it is one with company reminders…reminders from inexperienced managers attempting to motivate using sports analogies (which mean nothing to many guitar players) and name after name of "prospects". All the trappings of corporate life which I have accepted, at least for the time being. And I can deal. But there is something missing that could make it all worth while.

More money? Well duh. More satisfaction? You bet. Better hours? Oh yeah. Fulfillment? Hell yes!!...and yet these are not what has created the abyss in my morning.

I had my standard two cups of coffee at home—1 for the shower and 1 for the drive. Then to the most important meal of the day which consisted of a couple of these "Aussie Bites" from Costco, (which are quite tasty) and two pieces of string cheese. Which brings me to my point. Yes, I am caffeinated and somewhat nourished but, and here it goes, the abyss is this: I NEED A FREAKIN CHORIZO BURRO! THERE!! I said it. I need a big, fat, spicy mound of seasoned pork sausage and scrambled eggs wrapped in a huge burrito-sized tortilla. It has become so clear that had I been able to dive into a chorizo burro this morning that, at least for a few delicious chili-flavored minutes- all of these cubes and phones surrounding me would transform to a sandy beach, palm trees and waves. My coffee mug would become a Corona (or 4) and all these people I pretend to like would turn into my family and friends. Yes, chorizo can do that. AND, with the right helping of the right salsa, my dress slacks would mutate to my favorite jeans…I AM wearing a cool shirt today so that can stay.

As I sit here wondering if perhaps I sound a bit like Anthony Bourdain, I am somewhat relived. I spilled my guts but not the salsa. Now lunchtime approaches and salvation seems within my reach…just add beans and rice to that order.

Testing Blog Application in Word

2009-09-04T17:17:00.001-07:00

Have not blogged in soo long!!!!!! Facebook stole my attention but let's try this, shall we? If this works…stay tuned for a new series called "The Big Top Chronicles"

Hey Boy Blue Is Back

2009-02-17T06:04:00.003-07:00

It's 6 am which is not a usual time for me to be awake...I like to sleep in. But 4 straight days with the flu has provided me with ample slumber. So, I blog. Oh my lonely blog...tossed to the curb by the ever present Facebook, which will receive this feed! My title reference comes from a song by The Electric Light Orchestra, or ELO. My mother had more than a normal obsession with them, mainly their leader Jeff Lynne...maybe this is why I have a more than normal obsession with Pete Townshend. My mom is among the dearly departed but with me always; as she is right here, right now. I woke up around 5 with the song Boy Blue in my head...mainly the chorus,"Hey boy blue is back" I think she was telling me that I was indeed back, in many ways.

1. I am back from the dead...the hellish black death called the flu.
2. I am back from being worried about where my family will live. I received some advice from, of all people, a "legitimate" loan shark...if you can imagine such a thing. But if anyone knows who to work with people and money it is him. I have a plan, gonna pitch it, and let it fly.
3. And, I am going back to work. My least favorite of the three...

I am sure there is more. But this is a good start. Back in action. Back in the saddle, Back in black.
You get it, I know you do.

Thanks for waking me up this morning mom, I love you.

I'm back or at least on my way...

2008-12-03T13:39:00.002-07:00

A short little ditty to say I am on some very cool path right now...my creativity seems to be coming back and life seems brighter! I need to stay out of fear, anger, shame, guilt, all those things that do no good.

I am feeling a cosmic connection to my departed mother who is obviously "with me" right now, helping me, loving me, reassuring me and talking to my daughter!

More songs are on the way...more posts....more stories...more me.

Join me.

Soul Singing....is yours?

2008-11-14T09:57:00.001-07:00

O-BAMA! O-BAMA!

2008-10-07T14:10:00.002-07:00

24 is Back!

2008-10-01T16:04:00.001-07:00

Robin Hood and the Word of God

2008-09-04T09:59:00.005-07:00

Greek youths rob supermarket, hand out food

The whole Robin Hood thing is pretty cool, I must admit...well besides the tights and all. It reminds me of the age old question of when or if breaking the law, or for all you religious types, sinning is justified. Which is why I hate listening to preachers take the bible and get all legalistic. Or even worse a friend calling themselves a "brother or sister in Christ" telling you how to run your life. It just gets worse and worse after that. Politicians, teachers...religious people in general pick and choose what is wrong and right because it is for or against the WORD OF GOD...then cheat on their taxes, their spouses, spank it to the SI swimsuit issue, and wear pleated khaki shorts.

This whole discussion reminded me of an email I got from a friend chastising me about my vote for Obama because he is "pro-abortion". Which isn't true anyway, I mean no one is PRO abortion. But if some douchebag raped a girl/woman I cared about, hell even if I didn't, I wouldn't bat an eyelash if she wanted to term the pregnancy. And, I can't imagine the loving God I believe in would want to watch that child grow up with all that shame. The soul can be saved by just foregoing the flesh suit.

Wow, I guess I had something to say afterall.

Free Hugs

2008-07-23T11:09:00.003-07:00

SO, my college roommate sends me this today. I have watched it at least 10 times. I have teared up each time. While this video comes from a movement by a guy named Juan Mann, this one is used for aids awareness. But even at the most visceral level, what if? Could you do this? Could I? The courage to stand and offer a hug to whoever. For me, this is not too far out; I am a hugger. I always have been.

Yet there is more. I see things like this and my soul leaps...like, "I am supposed to be doing this, or something like it!"Then, as James Arthur Ray would say, "PARTICLE", my mind sends out a message that, "no, this is silly or irresponsible, or it doesn't make money"...BLAH BLAH BLAH!!!

But I know, the REAL ME, is on his way out of his shell, albeit a thin shell. I love activism, sending messages, helping people, spreading the word. The word is love.

Gore's 10 Year Challenge

2008-07-18T11:01:00.004-07:00

(From MoveOn.org)

When John F. Kennedy challenged America to put a man on the moon in 10 years, many called it impossible.

Now, Al Gore has given a major speech with another visionary call:

"Today I challenge our nation to commit to producing 100 percent of our electricity from renewable energy and truly clean carbon-free sources within 10 years."

This is huge. For someone with as much stature and credibility as Vice President Gore to embrace a goal this big and ambitious could be game-changing. But first, you've got to see it for yourself. Click here to watch the video.

Can't you just imagine the media ignoring Al Gore's message? If we pass this along to our friends and family, we'll make sure people hear about this, so our next president will accept the challenge.

We all know high gas prices and our economic downturn is related to climate change and the war in Iraq, but no one is connecting the dots. Until now.

Here's a key bit from Gore's speech:

Like a lot of people, it seems to me that all these problems are bigger than any of the solutions that have thus far been proposed for them, and that's been worrying me...

Yet when we look at all three of these seemingly intractable challenges at the same time, we can see the common thread running through them, deeply ironic in its simplicity: our dangerous over-reliance on carbon-based fuels is at the core of all three of these challenges—the economic, environmental and national security crises.

We're borrowing money from China to buy oil from the Persian Gulf to burn it in ways that destroy the planet. Every bit of that's got to change...

But if we grab hold of that common thread and pull it hard, all of these complex problems begin to unravel and we will find that we're holding the answer to all of them right in our hand.

The answer is to end our reliance on carbon-based fuels.

Can we really get all our electricity from sources like solar and wind in 10 short years?

Scientists have confirmed that enough solar energy falls on the surface of the earth every 40 minutes to meet 100 percent of the entire world's energy needs for a full year. Tapping just a small portion of this solar energy could provide all of the electricity America uses.

And enough wind power blows through the Midwest corridor every day to also meet 100 percent of US electricity demand.

And of course, all this means more good jobs to re-power our economy:

When we send money to foreign countries to buy nearly 70 percent of the oil we use every day, they build new skyscrapers and we lose jobs. When we spend that money building solar arrays and windmills, we build competitive industries and gain jobs here at home.

With all the political posturing on high gas prices and drilling, it's amazing to hear someone being so honest:

It is only a truly dysfunctional system that would buy into the perverse logic that the short-term answer to high gasoline prices is drilling for more oil ten years from now.

Am I the only one who finds it strange that our government so often adopts a so-called solution that has absolutely nothing to do with the problem it is supposed to address? When people rightly complain about higher gasoline prices, we propose to give more money to the oil companies and pretend that they're going to bring gasoline prices down. It will do nothing of the sort, and everyone knows it...

However, there actually is one extremely effective way to bring the costs of driving a car way down within a few short years. The way to bring gas prices down is to end our dependence on oil and use the renewable sources that can give us the equivalent of $1 per gallon gasoline.

It's truly a remarkable speech. Be sure to see it for yourself:

http://www.moveon.org/r?r=3945&id=13269-9224637-N.rTZ2x&t=3

VH1 ROCK HONORS--THE WHO!!!

2008-07-10T12:00:00.004-07:00

Long overdue I must say!! I haven't been excited to turn on the TV in a long time!

I just might pee myself!

LONG LIVE ROCK!!

More Notes From the Universe

2008-07-08T10:27:00.002-07:00

Check out this note I got today! This illustrates in lovely living color my problem with organized religion!! Thanks Mike!!

Tell me, when you think of taking consistent action in the general direction of your dreams, do you imagine discipline, stamina, work, sacrifice, monotony, courage, and strategies, or are you thinking adventure, discovery, new friends, excitement at the crack of dawn, magic, surprises, fun, laughter, and, on occasion, the Macarena?

Cool! Me too, "HEY!"
The Universe

Mike Dooley

The Funniest Thing Ever!!!

2008-06-17T15:34:00.000-07:00

It's Obama Baby!!

2008-06-03T16:20:00.002-07:00

Read all about it! Visionary leadership! Exactly what this country needs!!!

Happy Belated Birthday Pete!!

2008-05-20T10:12:00.007-07:00

I have an excuse for not posting this yesterday...I was in bed sick, but here goes anyway. Yesterday was the birthday of one of the most influential persons in my life not related to me. A few others are in there too...these guys named John, Paul, George, and Ringo, some dude named Jimi, a very cool cat named Jesus, a teacher from high school named Barclay, and a few others BUT one stands out from my childhood. None other than Pete Townshend from The Who! Oh, how you say can he be above someone like Jesus? Well, I didn't know Jesus then.

When I was a kid, like today, music was the only thing that made sense. Song lyrics were my gospel and Pete was like Saint Paul to me. Townshend's penchant for penning songs of teenage angst were just what I needed as an angry, misunderstood, creative (with few outlets), hurt, and lonely teenager. I think the masterpiece Quadrophenia hit me the hardest. A story of a young man with parents who didn't understand him, a society that made no sense, and four different personalities. Two songs in particular, I'm One, and 5:15 hit home the hardest. I remember thinking, "someone finally understands me". But enough about me.

I raise a glass to a genius, a true artist, and the master of smashing guitars!

LONG LIVE ROCK and PETE TOWNSHEND!!
Thank God you didn't die before you got old!

Gracie Live!!!

2008-05-14T18:48:00.001-07:00

Here is my Princess' first of many many singing performances. I cuts off early but you get enough to see how wonderful she is and is going to be!!!

Law of Attraction Weekend!!

2008-05-05T14:48:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to share some LoA magic with you all! I have been moonlighting with this patio furniture sales thing with some friends. WELL, I had a HUGE Saturday...all I did was post a craigslist ad and took a couple calls. Well one couple came to the warehouse and looked around. My friend/"boss" was there and while I basically told jokes and played hide and seek, she talked specifics to the folks to the tune of a $4500 sale (I got a sweet commish). THEN, out of nowhere, while I was playing "hide the book" with my "clients" kids, this couple walks in and within an hour bought over $3200 worth of stuff right off the bat...I told jokes and pointed at different pieces and fabrics. I basically goofed off, played with kids, and chatted up folks to the tune of what would be half of one of my JOB paychecks in about 4 hours!! We're talking almost $300 an hour!!!

So why am I telling you this? Because I TOTALLY attribute this success to practicing the Law of Attraction. I was actually very calm when I found out my commission because it was like a voice said calmly, this is just a sample of what the Law of Attraction has for you...now have some more!

Peace, love, abundance, and rock and roll to you all!!
Lionel

Promise Yourself

2008-05-05T12:45:00.003-07:00

This from Christian Larson's book that I found on Transforming Chronic Illness into Vibrant Health. I HIGHLY recommend you go there!

Promise Yourself

To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.
To talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person you meet.
To make all your friends feel that there is something in them.
To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.
To think only of the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.
To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile.
To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.
To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear; and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words but in great deeds.
To live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you.

Promise Yourself These Things!

More Notes From The Universe

2008-05-01T11:59:00.000-07:00

Actually, trusting what you cannot touch, taste, hear, smell, or see is ultimately how you'll touch, taste, hear, smell, and see the most.

And we're talkin' all that glitters, giggles, and gallops, for starters....

Giddy-up,
The Universe and M Dooley

Notes From the Universe

2008-04-29T16:56:00.001-07:00

Notes From the Universe

“In the face of adversity, uncertainty and conflicting sensory information,
I hereby pledge to remain ever mindful of the magical, infinite, loving reality
in which I live. A reality that conspires tirelessly in my favor."

"I further recognize, that living within space and time, as a Creation amongst my Creations, is the ultimate Adventure, because thoughts become things, dreams come true, and all things remain forever possible."

"As a Being of Light, I hereby resolve to live, love and be happy, at all costs, no matter what, with reverence and kindness for All. So be it!”

Mike Dooley

Stuck in Randomness

2008-04-22T11:09:00.002-07:00

Dammit, I am a writer, a guitar player, a songwriter and all I can get out of my fucking head is random shit like this! As if I am afraid to open the flood gates and let it all pour out...it would be messy but I know there is some tasty shit in there...WHAT THE FUCK AM I WAITING FOR?
I need to make some life-changing decisions and I can't do it one way or the other...stay miserable or get on with my life...June isn't waiting in a room somewhere...at least not yet perhaps.

On a good note: Today marks the day of my daughter's first audition for a talent show. The first of many...

Baby: I know you are nervous, I know you are scared, but don't be anymore, cuz Daddy will be there. So stand up and shine, shine, shine.

My Favorite Headline!!!

2008-03-25T13:41:00.001-07:00

The Who, and only The Who!

I just saw this story about VH1 honoring The Who...and only The Who.

Hell, I needed to post about something!

Don't Run Away

2008-02-27T14:09:00.003-07:00

This one is for my number 1 son. The first person I ever really loved.

Don't Run Away

Where are you going?

I see you out on the fringe

What do you need from me?

So I can pull you back in?

Do I need to take something back?

Something I’ve said or done

Did I push you off the track?

I hate to see you on the run

Because of you

I wanted to live again

Because of you

I learned to love again

Please don’t run away

Please won’t you stay?

What’s going on

In that brilliant mind?

What would I find

If you let me in?

For you I would give my life

The first one to give me life

I knew you were an angel

I knew God sent me an angel

Because of you

I wanted to live again

Because of you

I learned to love again

Please don’t run away

Please won’t you stay?

Can’t Stay This Way (For God and Grace)

2008-02-27T13:17:00.002-07:00

The corporate world started to weigh me down. I wanted to wallow in it. But on my monitor, staring me in the face is The Memorandum From God, and just underneath that is a picture of my little princess. The lyrics speak for themselves.

Can’t Stay This Way (For God and Grace)

I can’t listen to you know

Your words are in my face

I would rather stay in anger

Then let You take me from this place

Misery loves my company

Or maybe it is me

That seeks out the dark recess

That loves the misery

And there You are

My bright and shining star

Looking through me

Smiling over me

You make it hard to stay this way

I just can’t stay this way

The darkness on my shoulder

Pulls for me to

But your eyes keep me connected

To the brightness of your soul

And there You are

My bright and shining star

Looking through me

Smiling over me

You make it hard to stay this way

I just can’t stay this way

All I need is to see your face

That keeps me from the darker place

Thank you for your beautiful face

You keep me from the darker place

Thank God For The Black Crowes

2008-01-29T09:19:00.000-07:00

The new Black Crowes album, WARPAINT is due out on March 4th! They have one song streaming on their site...Goodbye Daughters of the Revolution. It is a smoky, Stonsey, southern-fried chunk of rock and roll goodness.

Just what an old rock and roller needs to feed the soul.
Go feed yours.

You Won't, I Won't

2008-01-24T16:45:00.000-07:00

You won't poison my mind
I won't believe your lies
You won't trick me with your words
I won't let you in my head
You won't seduce me to keep me
I won't give in to your advances
You influence the ones I love most
I won't let you fill little minds with lies
You won't convince me I am wrong
I won't let you push my buttons
You won't place the blame on me
I won't let you dump it all on me
You won't get away with your ugly plan
I won't let you take my life from me

Don't forget who you are dealing with. But you don't really know who I am.

Fitness Log

2008-01-17T13:38:00.000-07:00

For the body:
The last three days had a jog each night
Healthy dinners...not too much!
No more than two light beers per night.

For the soul:
I am reading a little...a trip to the library in the works
I am listening to more diverse music...someone turned me on to Pandora! Check it out and set up your own station!
I am listening to a great podcast from Mosaic Church by Erwin Rafael McManus called "Billboard: Life is Short, Have An Affair." It is about how we pay a price in our souls for a moment's pleasure...or maybe a month or two of them. Very timely for me. (No I did NOT have an affair...) How choices made out of selfishness and desperation lead to destruction. The main point is Jesus' message of denying oneself. Not denying the good in you but denying the temptations that only offer a moment of pleasure. The truth shall set you free.

The main message is really Life is Short so live it in freedom, creativity, joy, purpose, freedom, and most of all...love. God gives this too us. I am embracing this today and stop wasting my life and live.

Life is too short to be unhealthy.

Fitness Log 2

2008-01-09T10:08:00.000-07:00

Went for another jog last night. Made a healthy pasta dinner with whole wheat pasta. Probably ate too much bread but it's a start. 1 and a half glasses of red wine. Went to bed fairly early. I need to start adding some sort of songwriting to my days. Not that you care. I know you are but what am I?

----------------
Now playing: The Flaming Lips - Fight Test
via FoxyTunes

I Agree With Obama

2008-01-08T12:20:00.000-07:00

This from Obama after being criticized by Billery about his use of language. I too believe in the power of words.

"The truth is actually words do inspire," he said. "Words do help people get involved. Words do help members of Congress get into power so that they can be part of a coalition to deliver healthcare reform, to deliver a bold energy policy. Don't discount that power, because when the American people are determined that something is going to happen, then it happens. And if they are disaffected and cynical and fearful and told that it can't be done, then it doesn't. I'm running for president because I want to tell them, 'Yes, we can.' And that's why I think they're responding in such large numbers."

----------------
Now playing: Abra Moore - Four Leaf Clover
via FoxyTunes

I Started..

2008-01-08T10:04:00.000-07:00

Went for a jog last night
Ate a healthy dinner...which I cooked of course since I am going to be an Iron Chef
Only drank one beer (this was a biggie!)
Went to bed early

I am on my way to a new me...or the old one that got run down. I figure I have a little less than half a life left and the last years will be much the same as my first ones...peeing myself, being fed, needing help to walk, little hair, drooling, wearing diapers...BUT I am going to make these last ones last, but I need to last to enjoy them. I am looking forward to:

Maddogging my daughter's boyfriends
Watching my son maddog my daughter's boyfriends
Lecturing my son about sex and drugs while encouraging rock and roll
Proms, plays, first dates, walking my daughter down the aisle
Witnessing my son's transformation into a man
Making more and more memories
Discussing college with my boy
More paintball, more camping, more fishing, more Guitar Hero!

There is so much more and I need to be around to see it. Bet on it. Plan on it.

Damn, I copped out with a list again. But I am a work in progress.
----------------
Now playing: Foo Fighters - Long Road To Ruin
via FoxyTunes

Rock is Not Dead...

2008-01-04T13:26:00.000-07:00

Came across these guys via a fellow Who blogger...good to hear rock and roll again...check them out and rock. This music inspires me and it will you too, or you are dead.

Plus they covered Townshend and did a damn good job...if you know me and my, um, admiration...oh fuck it, idol worship of Pete you know I don't throw these cudos lightly.

But who am I? (Who Are You?) Check it out for yourself.

http://thirdofnever.blogspot.com/2007/10/moodringing.html

Do it now!

Oh Ate

2008-01-04T12:49:00.000-07:00

Never one to make resolutions but I do have some aspirations this year...in no particular order.

YES I ADMIT LISTS ARE LAME and a poor excuse for not writing but stop yelling at me. Actually each of these can turn into good posts...

1. I am pledging to be myself, not what anyone else wants me to be.
2. I am going to focus more on making music. This comes with a determination to not wonder if anyone will like a song or not.
3. Stop procrastinating on my dreams...stop thinking I am too old to do the things I want, especially in regards to music and songwriting.
4. Cook more...actually I want to be the next Iron Chef, but I am not a chef...YET!
5. Get my fucking finances in order.
6. Get rid of my gut.
7. Drink less booze...cut out the smokes.
8. Do more fun things with my kids.
9. Dust off my bible maybe.
10. Avoid negative thoughts that lead to inertia...because inertia doesn't rock

Ok that is a good start.

The Tundra of My Office

2008-01-02T11:24:00.000-07:00

No I am not on the East Coast in the midst of a snow drift, but I am freezing my ass off in my office. I can't do anything. "We put in a call to maintenance" just isn't cutting it for me right now. It is literally 68 degrees...oh and Happy New Year my loyal and loving throngs of readers!

Jesus Is My Drummer

2007-12-19T17:11:00.000-07:00

No time for details kids but this I can say: Jesus is alive and well in my life. I have kept Him at arms length for a long time. It is now time to, as they say, "come to Jesus". He has given me a glimpse and taste of peace in my life that has been filled with pain and turmoil lately. Supernatural stuff. He showed me how He forgives. I don't do it very well. He has let me function in the past 24 hours out of His spirit and not mine, thank God...get it?

So to you hundreds of loyal Stradasphere readers, today I proclaim the power of God!

You should too, it's much better than vodka.

Because I Moved

2007-10-19T10:27:00.000-07:00

This came to me in the car this morning.

Because I Moved

The bar was the perfect escape from the rain. Pushing the door open with my pocketed hand, I looked to the bartender; “should I shake off the rain or continue to my stool”? His smile told me not to worry about it. I welcomed the smoke and even more the sound. A girl sat at a piano, dimly lit, a large snifter with a few singles perched atop. I knew the song and hummed along though there were no words. Maybe Sinatra, maybe Dean. It didn’t matter. It took me to a place that fit right in with my vodka as it slid toward me. I smiled into the glass looking for faces in the ice cubes. Faces I loved, and even those I didn’t. I saw them all. Still humming I smirked and strained to see those I may have passed by too quickly, dismissed too suddenly, fighting off regret. Yet I savored the possibilities of missed chances as though they were still there. It was exhilarating.

With a squeeze of my lime, the song was gone. The girl leaned back and nodded in appreciation to the ladies night out table cheering her on. I took a moment to down my glass, nod for another, and light a smoke. My glass was met with a few smoke rings. My accuracy pleased me and the bartender agreed.

The girl at the piano started something new. She changed everything, including me. The unrecognizable tune crept in slowly at first with the occasional resolve, yet dissonance seemed to rule. I couldn’t help turn to her as if to ask how she knew me. How did her fingers know what to say as they bounced from white to black, black to white, black and white? And she moved. Her long curls waved deliberately in front of her face with each staccato. Her backlit smile slid across her with each legato. Turning back to my glass the faces were gone, but all of those that were there before had left their mark. In an instant I was crying. The darkness hid my heaving, the raindrops hid my tears, and she played. As the movement moved, so did I. Tears of loss, tears of pain, tears of regret all fell at once…until the key change. Whether D minor, or F sharp it mattered not. Not at all, because I moved. I missed the other tears, the tears that outnumbered the first. My heart and mind flew as fast as her fingers, and followed her down a road of pure joy, peace and purpose. Yet it was an electrifying peace, perhaps a bit void of the conventional rendition.

I had gone where I need to go, and she took me there. Turning away from my vodka and tears, I honored her retardando and resolution. A slender, ringed finger signaled the end with a smile and a sole black key. The ladies night out table took a moment to respond. She more confused them than moved them. At least this time around. I doubt she heard my hand clapping but I know she saw my face as moved toward her jar. Maybe she knew what she had done. My eyes have never been good at hiding, especially when they are red. My hand reached for a couple singles as the other went to shake her hand. Her grip was gracious yet told me not to complete the transaction. She got what she wanted and I got what I needed. We shared a knowing grin and she went back to what she does. The ladies night out table knew this one. I did too. Definitely Sinatra, but I had heard what I came to hear.

(No) Guitar and Pen Friday

2007-09-14T11:20:00.000-07:00

Sitting in a cage(office) I can write lyrics all day...there is just one thing missing.

No Guitar

All of these words, in me
Flitting like bird, from me
But I’m stuck in this cage
My heart on this page
And I’ve got no guitar

Why did you leave me?
I need you to feed me
A bee stuck in a jar
No near or no far
I’ve got no guitar, no guitar

No guitar, no guitar
How did I get to this hell?
No guitar, no guitar
Words in a bottomless well

All of these dreams, in me
None of it seems, to me
Unrealistic
Border sadistic
And I’ve got no guitar

Why can’t you just stay with me?
I need you to play with me
But I’m stuck in this place
No chance of escape
I’ve got no guitar, no guitar

No guitar, no guitar
How did I get to this hell?
No guitar, no guitar
Words in a bottomless well

A Problem With Pearl

2007-09-13T14:27:00.000-07:00

I wrote this song for my little pink tornado. My wife came in one day with "that look" on her face. Of course Pearl is Grace. Now let's get one thing PERFECTLY clear. I am NOT wrapped around my daughter's little finger...but it's so hard for me to get mad at her sometimes because she is so adorable. I literally have to leave the room sometimes, even after she has destroyed her room, because I am laughing. Anyway, this is a song for my girls.

A Problem With Pearl

She said
We have a problem here
Please come near
She called
Needing a helping hand

I know
There aren’t words to say
Anyway
I tried
To chill things out

This time it has nothing to do with me
The issue lies in some other place
It seems we have a problem with Pearl
You can see it written all over her face

Pearl won’t you listen?
Pearl why don’t you care?
You’ve gotta stop throwing everything
Up into the air

Lifehouse_Everything Skit

2007-09-10T10:28:00.000-07:00

An old friend sent me this...at first I thought it was going to be some cheesy high school "drama" (I hate that word because I am an arrogant actor) but I kept watching and it brought me to tears. Aren't we all that girl?

Dig the audience response. I wish I went to this church.

CLICK HERE NOW!

Down With Down's

2007-08-29T10:56:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning bothered, terrified, angry, sullen, and hopeless. Mostly because my mind put me in my brother's shoes. He and his sweet wife just had a beautiful daughter...but there is a catch, little Chloe has Down's Syndrome. They seem to be taking it ok. I was not this morning. My freaking overactive imagination put me in the mindset of where my bro might be. The heartache, dashed dreams, horror, anger, confusion all hit me so hard I had to work very hard to shove the whole scenario out of my brain.

But I still want to cry. Here I am with two perfectly healthy kids and I am much more of an asshole than my bro. He is one of the nicest people I know, and his wife is even nicer. I got to go to little league games and look forward to seeing my daughter's first dance recital and play. For the bro and sis-in-law, they are looking at what they will have to do to take care of their princess, will she get made fun of, how disabled will she be, will she look like either of them when she gets older, will she be able to play an instrument, ect. They don't deserve this. DAMMIT.

It was their first baby and they did everything right. They waited until they had the resources to care for a child, they planned it out. Everything was in place.

Yes, they will love her with all the love in the world, so will our family. But still, DAMMIT. Their future has been shoved into a completely different direction. The baby needs heart surgery at 6 months, and she is so tiny. DAMMIT (No, I am not trying to be Jack Bauer here)

Oh, I know, I know, God has His reasons and all that. But, today I am pissed at Him. Why my brother and his wife? The age old question: "Why do good things happen to good people?" You know what? I don't give a shit right now about all the Christiany things people will say. "God has a plan", "This is a blessing in disguise", and a hundred others. DAMMIT

Why him, why her, why them?

Little Chloe, this is your uncle Lionel. I am sorry. And I promise to love you with all my heart and soul. The good news is, you have great parents. And don't listen to me right now, God really does love you.

I Feel Like Caca

2007-08-28T11:45:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted in years so I thought I would whine a bit. I feel like crap today. I am lethargic, sleepy, (same thing I guess), crabby, unmotivated blah blah blah...I hate it when I don't have energy. I feel out of my game. I don't want to talk to anyone, do any work, blah blah blah...I think I should go home and go to sleep. Unless I fall asleep at my desk...see picture in previous post..

So, feel sorry for me.
Thanks

HARD AT WORK!!!

2007-08-07T13:25:00.000-07:00

It May Not Look Like It, But…

2007-08-02T11:12:00.001-07:00

I actually dig my job now!! I have hated it for years now. Stuck behind a desk, red-tape bullshit, grim outlook on advancement…whaaa! But lately things have been looking up. As Director of the creative team, I have been given so much more say on what goes on. My team is doing incredible new multimedia projects, and upper management is behind me and has my back! I haven’t said “I like my boss” in years…now I can say that. I have a great team of creative, twisted designers, and the best part is…I RUN THE SHOW! A little ego there…but whatever!

A Call For Change...In Me

2007-07-08T14:03:00.000-07:00

A better part of my weekend was spent in front of my computer watching the Live Earth concert. And while I made sure all my lights were off went to bed there is a more immediate change that needs to take place...a change in how I see my life. I have way too many regrets and too many songs to write and record and perform.

Arrested: It was the Police videos that got me. When they became big, I had just started my first band. We were a three-piece too, but none of us sang at the time. That's when I started to see my dreams, in the living rooms and backyards of my high school friends. From that point on I was always playing music. My next band, The Rundles, were all over town for years. We gigged all the time and everywhere. I was living my life the way I always thought I should. I won't go into the sex and drugs and booze stuff, you have all heard it before.

The Stage: I love the stage, I love the audience, I love performing more than anything. I went into theatre for a while and found a new love of performing. Music took a back seat for a while, but it pulled me back in. I quit acting school, thought I was going to be a lawyer for a while, then got back into music with Beggar's Theater, the band. We were freaking good and had a shot, except for egos and coke.

The Announcement: During the Beggar's Theater days I found out I was going to be a father...oops! I always wanted a son and now I got one. I had to get off drugs, so I did. The problems is that I associated drugs and booze so much with performing that I thought I had to quit it all together. Yes, it's hard to be a dad when you are at rehearsal and gigs at night, but I threw it all away. Somehow I got it mixed up in my head that I couldn't follow my heart and grow one in my son.

The Midlife Crisis: So here I am today wondering if at 42 I can somehow get back into music someway. I hold myself back from writing and practicing because I think it will take time away from my wife and kids. It does take time, effort, and sacrifice. I feel guilty when I do...I get very obsessive when writing and need to be alone. Try that in a house with a wife and two rowdy kids! Damn it! I have to. Part of me is dying inside.

The Decision: Yeah I'll help save the earth, but I need to save myself first. I am going to fight against the lies in my head telling me I blew it. I didn't I followed my heart for what I thought was right. Now I am going to do it again. Gotta go, I have a guitar to play.

Lights Out!

I need a new post

2007-05-24T18:10:00.001-07:00

I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post I need a new post